You're Mad!
by CandyAppleBlack
Summary: An Az fic. Need I say more? Probably. Az is comming to terms with becomming a vampire, thanks to Merrill who thought his neck was a nummy treat. While he whines about it to himself, he realizes he's not alone....(bad summary, yes I know)


Disclaimer: This is an inane little Fic that I actually wrote for my writing class and decided to upload  
for the sheer sadistic pleasure of it. It is a Vampire High Fic (though most of it consists of Az and a  
'special' friend....no not like that!). Anywho, I just though t I'd share this insanity with the world.  
Actually, I'm currently working on a Marty/Essie Fic called 'Butterfly' that will be up relatively  
soon. It's gonna be so sweet and cute! So enjoy this in the mean time:P  
  
Wait! There's actually a little game with this Fic. See if you can guess as to 'who' or 'what' Garfield is  
by the time you reach the end! Yeah....  
  
'I wrote this', A CandyAppleBlack Fic. (c) 5/17/02 All Right Reserved  
  
  
VAMPIRE HIGH  
  
Title: YOU'RE MAD! (don't ask. Inside joke)  
  
  
{Az (you know Az, you read 'High Vampires'. Yes, yes you have and if you haven't go read it,   
read it now. I'll wait ~waits in chair with extra large cup of coffee~) is sitting off in nice shady  
little corner of the Wine Cellar. His is leaned up against the wall with is head in his hands. The  
only things around him are, a table, two chairs, some stone gargoyle mounted on the wall and the  
chess board. He starts talking to, what appears to be, himself.}   
  
  
Azreal- God, I still can't fathom the fact that I was embracing humanity only a week ago. I suppose  
for all rights and purposes I am alive, I mean I have no rigamortis....or pulse. God, I'm a walking  
flatline!   
  
Garfield- You're walking, be grateful. It's more than I can do.  
  
Azreal- I suppose you're right...wait, ~lifts up head~ who are you?  
  
Garfield- I'm the one who sits here listening to you whine and moan every evening.  
  
Azreal- Oh god I have stalker. Do you have a name? Who do I tell the police to arrest?  
  
Garfield- I highly doubt that I would be convicted of anything. And if you tried to contact the  
authorities, you'd be sent to a mad house I'm sure.   
  
Azreal- I see, but I'd still like to know who I'm talking to. So feel free to toss me a name.  
  
Garfield- You can call me Garfield boy. 'Boy'. So informal. I was kind enough to give you my name ,  
so perhaps you'd show me the same respect and give me yours.  
  
Azreal- ...Alright. I'm Azreal Black.  
  
Garfield- HA! You can't possibly expect me to believe that that's you real name. Who in their right  
mind would give their child THAT for a name? Why, I wouldn't be at all shocked if that wasn't your  
real name...  
  
Azreal- ~says in insulted, unamused tone~ Are you done? And who the hell are you to talk, your  
name's Garfield.   
  
Garfield- Yes well. At any rate, at least I'm not sitting on the floor complaining when I should be  
counting my lucky stars.  
  
Azreal- Lucky? I'm dead incase you haven't noticed. I can't believe I'm talking to you.  
  
Garfield- Raise you hand and strike your arm with it.  
  
Azreal- Excuse me? You want me to hit myself?  
  
Garfield- Yes. Do it, do it now.  
  
Azreal- Wha..uh..I...~groans~. You know what, fine. ~hits self~ There I smacked my arm, are you  
happy, have you been hit with a sudden revelation?  
  
Garfield- You were able to do the action. It seems to me, that if you were dead you'd be a  
motionless corpse, not an agile being.  
  
Azreal- That's a good point. But I have no pulse, I can't go out in the sun, and I 'm dead to  
everyone that matters to me. ~drops head, sulks~  
  
Garfield- But despite what you've become, you are still living.  
  
Azreal- ~mutters~ Some life.   
  
Garfield- You should be grateful you still exist at all.  
  
Azreal- Yeah, well if the people you love don't know you still exist than what's the point? And even  
if I did see them I'd probably kill them. I never asked to become vampire. I never asked to be  
brought here. Why did Marty bring me here?   
  
Garfield- Uh, Pity. You were intoxicated on the floor of a bar. He couldn't just leave you there.  
  
Azreal- So he brought me into the lions den...~rolls eyes~ Gee, thanks Marty!  
  
Garfield- I highly doubt he meant to cause you harm.  
  
Azreal- Yeah I know. I don't think the one who made me planed to hurt me either.  
  
Garfield- ~cocks eyebrow~ I see.  
  
Azreal- ~say in annoyed, perturbed tone~ I hate Merrill.  
  
Garfield- Hate is such a strong word.  
  
Azreal- And what pre-tell would you call the person who ended you life? "Honey"?  
  
Garfield- You listen to me boy...  
  
Azreal- My name is Azreal! ~aggitated~ GOD DAMMIT!  
  
Garfield- ~scoffs~ Stupid name...Fine, Azreal. The only thing I can do I sit up here and listen  
you...I can't even leave the room! I can't even move god dammit! And here you are pouting about  
~says in mocking tone~ no longer being able to play in the sunshine.  
  
Azreal- Are YOU giving ME lip!? I'm dead, I'm allowed to complain...I'm dead, I died, deceased,  
expired! You...your a..your a...you! Who are you and, who do you think you are?!   
  
Garfield- I think I'm...talking to a Daft Fuckwit! You've been given a second chance a life...  
  
Azreal- Second chance!? I still hadn't finished my first chance! I was turned into a vampire! Hence  
the 'I'm Dead!' rant!  
  
Garfield- I don't know if you were like this in your mortal life, but all you've turned into is a whiney,  
simpering, sniveling baby!   
  
Azreal- What...? ~says in angered to the point where he has a small homicidal facial twitch near his  
left eye, tone~ Oh that's it...you give me one good reason why I shouldn't take a sledge hammer to  
you big stupid lookin' piece of....  
  
{Peering in the door way, quietly observing the so called 'interaction'}  
  
Karl- Essie? Who's Az talking to?  
  
Essie- It looks like he's talking to himself. Why is he talking to himself? Has he lost it?  
  
Karl- You know what it does look like?  
  
Essie- What?  
  
Karl- Like he's talking to that stone gargoyle up on the wall.....  
  
  
THE END  
  
  
  
  
Yes well. I know this Fic was so inane! Did you all get it? Did figure out who Garfield was? Well I  
hope you all liked this little rant in the form of a Vampire High Fic. Please review...Please? I know  
this story was pointless and inane....but like in the sad little tree in the Charlie Brown Christmas  
Special, 'It just needs a little love!'. So show this Fic you care...REVIEW:P 


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